When Trying Harder Isn’t Enough
Changing the Narrative on Evaluations and ADHD Diagnosis
I was 10 years old when I learned the meaning of—and how to spell—the word loquacious. I will never forget the horrible knot in my stomach as I was forced to write it over and over again on the classroom chalkboard. L-o-q-u-a-c-i-o-u-s. I fought to hold back tears as I printed each letter until, finally, I was allowed to return to my seat.
Being “That Kid”
I was creative, curious, and a competitive gymnast. I was an excellent reader, eager to please, and enrolled in the Talent Development (TD) program at my school. But none of these strengths seemed to matter.
Making friends was starting to get hard. I wanted to run, climb, and flip, while other girls my age wanted to make friendship bracelets and chat during recess. I was constantly distracted and getting lost during instruction. I could never find my homework—or anything else, for that matter. I loved learning new things and desperately wanted to understand and feel understood. I would ask question after question until I drove my teachers crazy.
Every day, I felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin. As much as I loved learning, school was overwhelming. And the harder I tried, the worse it seemed to get.
“You’re just a little too much.”
“You just need to try harder.”
“You’re too sensitive.”
“You just don’t care enough.”
“You care too much.”
I was officially “that kid.” It felt like something in my brain was broken. Despite my good grades, I felt like a failure. This exhausting pattern continued for the remainder of elementary and middle school.
The Breaking Point
In 9th grade, my parents and I knew I needed a change. I was accepted into a highly regarded college preparatory school filled with high-achieving kids and amazing opportunities. With smaller classes and more engaging content, I should have thrived.
Instead, I was placed on academic probation. I met with teachers during every free period for extra help and did everything in my power to keep up. Still, the voice in my head only grew louder: “You’re just not good enough.” This cycle continued until my advisor contacted my parents and recommended a psychological evaluation. He could see my potential and how hard I was working, and he knew there had to be something else going on. That conversation led to an ADHD evaluation that would change my life forever.
Picking Up the Pieces: The Power of a Diagnosis
I don’t remember much about the testing process from over 20 years ago, but the diagnosis that followed was a profound turning point. What I learned from that evaluation changed how I felt and what I had come to believe about myself. I didn’t just need to “try harder.” There were real, measurable differences in how my brain regulated attention, emotions, and motivation. I wasn’t broken, and I wasn’t lazy—it wasn’t my fault. Suddenly, everything started to make sense.
The adults around me helped me learn how my unique brain worked and how to leverage my strengths. I started taking stimulant medication, and for the first time, I stopped feeling broken. That experience—my own ADHD diagnosis—wasn’t just a label; it was the key that helped me finally feel capable and whole.
Today, as a psychologist supporting children, teens, and their parents, I am constantly reminded of how the clarity following a comprehensive evaluation can transform lives.
Changing the Narrative on Testing and Labels
Many parents worry that seeking a diagnosis means they’ve failed, or that their child isn't trying hard enough. Others fear a label is just an excuse for “bad behavior” or that a diagnosis will make their child feel “different.” My job—and my passion—is to change that narrative.
My lived experience as “that kid” has shaped every aspect of my practice. Today, I have the privilege of working with kids and teens who feel misunderstood, exhausted parents searching for answers, and teachers looking for ways to help. My goal is to help families find the clarity and confidence to make informed choices, access the right support, and feel empowered rather than defeated.
I believe knowledge is power. I view psychological evaluations as tools for growth, connection, and deep understanding. This process is just as much about identifying strengths as it is about addressing concerns.
You Don't Have to Navigate This Alone
If my story resonates with you, please know that you are not alone. At Mind Mosaic Psychology, we provide comprehensive psychological assessments for children, teens, and adults designed to bring the same kind of understanding and relief I found all those years ago.
Whether you’re exploring ADHD testing for your child, seeking an adult autism diagnosis, or simply wanting to better understand how your mind works, we are here for you. We are here to listen, honor your experiences, and support you in finding the clarity, confidence, and practical guidance that aligns with your life and goals.
